Anna Span Got Me in Trouble

I am lucky to know one or two generous people who occasionally allow me to benefit from their large collections of pornographic DVDs. A couple of months ago I was visiting one of those friends, idly browsing the badly concealed smut collection underneath her minuscule TV set while chatting. At some point in the conversation, I confessed that I had not seen any of Anna Span's movies. This was greeted with a moment of shocked silence. Then her boyfriend took the situation in hand, rushed to the shelves and handed me their treasured copy of A&O Department, invitingly decorated with a spread and smiling actress photographed in flagrante delicto on a hospital bed.

To round off my homework they added a couple of S&M flavoured Tanya Hyde flicks with a lot of fetishwear on the cover, and finally something polite and tasteful for couples. A drink or two later they sent me on my merry way with a bagful of porn.

Fast forward two months. Hoping for an opportunity to see the owners of the DVDs one afternoon, since I was heading to their neck of the woods for work, I fired off an email to ask if they'd be around and packed the obscene loot in my laptop case. Unfortunately, it turned out the pervs were going out of town, so I wound up carrying a load of porn in my bag for no reason.

As you do, with half an hour to spare between appointments, I wandered into a bookshop, browsed the shelves, bought a book, headed out the exit...

Beep, beep.

Annoyed, but not particularly worried, I handed the newly purchased book back to the nice lady at the checkout, who ran it over the demagnetizing plate again...

Beep, beep.

The security had now taken an interest in me. I looked sheepish, handed him the purchase and stuck my laptop case between the security sensors.

Beep, beep.

"Could we take a look in your bag, please," asked the nice lady.

I opened it for her, pulled out the laptop. She poked around inside, noticed the book-like shapes of the DVDs inside and pulled one out at random.

It was Anna Span's A&O Department. Now, this is seriously good filth (see Anna Span's Diary for more graphic details) - it's easygoing, good-humoured, and the sex is hot. Seriously, if Anna ever needs a guest-writer I'll happily volunteer... but I digress.

The nice lady dropped the DVD like it was made of hot lead, and it landed on the desk with a loud noise that drew the attention of everyone around, as it bounced to the floor at her feet. She looked down like she wasn't entirely sure what to do next.

"Um, could you hand me that?" I asked, helpfully, holding the bag open for her.

She very bravely picked the DVD up, holding it like a dead rat between two fingers, and dropped it in the bag with the other disreputable items of entertainment. I put my stuff back in and closed the flap.

"Just... just go through. Don't worry about the alarm."

And so it went.

Beep, beep.

When I strolled out, I felt a slight tinge of embarrassment - the noise began immediately when I stepped through the exit, and people watched me as I strolled out under the nose of the security guard. That's when feeling hit me - I was OK with having the porn discovered (particularly since I was carrying good porn - if it had been crap porn I'd have been mortified), but being looked at like I had just stolen some books - that burned.

50 Words - Yes

Lying on her back, she opened even wider. I added another finger, and her pussy stretched to accommodate the welcome intrusion. "Some more?" I asked. She whispered "yes," but she had already lost count of the lubricated digits inside her. Awash in sensation, she would have said yes to anything.

Bring out the spokesmodel

Flattered down to the tips of my toes, I proudly inform you that I am the spokesmodel for "the sex positive movement," along with Bacchus of ErosBlog.

Actually Bacchus gets top billing, and I am merely the second banana to his fruitcake in this 2-year old discussion forum entry, titled "The sex positive movement is not your friend", forwarded to me by a kind reader. This post about cuddleparties earned me the honour. The dark side of this story is, unfortunately, that the post's author claims that I advocate coercing asexuals into frantic copulation. This is wrong, and a misrepresentation of my non-bendy, non-negotiable attitude to the principle of consent.

My point here is not to pretend that I'm aggrieved at a 2-year old reaction to a blog post. The interesting thing is that Asexuality.org is a fascinating site, particularly if you're interested not just in forms of sexuality but in alternatives to it.

50 Words - Irresistible

The combination of red skirt and no underwear made me almost dizzy with lust. Once I had tied her wrists to the chair and made sure she could not touch herself, my attempt at teasing her with slow fingers failed in a matter of moments. Spread, wet, she was irresistible.

Watch (6)

We did this a couple of times - me watching, instructing, photographing, enjoying their pleasure in the performance. No touching. Just observing as closely as I could without directly participating in the sweaty, intense fucking.

"Having an audience brings out his aggressive side," she confided in an email, and I could imagine the satisfied smile on her face when she typed the words.

The second time we met was more hurried and improvised than the first. I was in their city on short notice, but when I emailed ahead I got an almost immediate response. I don't know, but I imagine a furtive lunchtime phone call between the two of them, whispering into their mobile phones somewhere out of the earshot of colleagues.

This time we started in their dining room, her skirt around her hips. She sat on the edge of the sturdy table and leaned back, inviting him between her legs - two fingers teasing her labia. He took her in his mouth with a satisfied growl, his mouth settling over her sex, pushing her fingers away.

They stumbled from table to chair to sofa, bending, sitting, stretching their bodies to put on the show they wanted.

In their bedroom, he came in her mouth. Standing with knees slightly bent he grabbed her hair with both hands, holding it bunched in his fists. She knelt in front of him, eyes closed in the deep pleasure of being ruthlessly used, and he seemed to have no restraint left. Fucking her mouth in long, deep strokes that she struggled to accommodate, he let out a loud, deep roar of primal satisfaction. His cum, mixed with spit dribbled down her chin as she pulled back and caught her breath.

Falling to his knees, facing her, he kissed her before she had time to open her eyes, lovingly stroking the rumpled mess of her hair.

"You looked funny just then," she told me later. "The way your mouth hung open was terribly cute."

Watch (5)

It began with them standing, facing me, smiling wickedly. Then his hands slid down her body, cupping her breasts, sliding down her stomach and clasping her hips.

He began to unbutton her blouse.

"No," I said. "Pull her skirt up."

It was pretty short, so hubby didn't have far to pull. She was naked underneath. He held the front of her skirt up with one hand, spreading the pink blondness of her pussy open with the other, showing me the glistening wetness.

Leaning back into his embrace, she cocked her hips at me, her legs apart.

"He's got you on display. You like being shown off, don't you?"

Eyes shut, smiling, she purred "Yes..."